thebibliosphere:

thebibliosphere:

thebibliosphere:

thebibliosphere:

Our home security system is being updated today, and the guy in charge is just peak Gen Z, no professional fucks given vibe and it’s hysterical.

“I mean, I’m supposed to recommend stuff, like you should probably put a sensor on that window too, but like, that’s really a you decision. I just have to say this stuff out loud so I don’t get sued if you get broken into.”

“So, like, just to clarify, you don’t want the cameras, right? Only I need to make sure because sometimes people say no on the phone, and then when I’m leaving, they ask me why I haven’t installed the cameras yet, and I’m just like, that’s a you problem, I’m going home.”

*leaning around the corner of my office to talk to me* “Hey, do you know where [Mothman] went? Actually, never mind, you’re probably the detail-oriented one. I can tell by the *gestures at my candy-floss-colored goth office* whatever this is.

So like, the new alarm panel is smaller than the old one, and the old one pulled off some of the paint, I can try to hide it, but it won’t be perfect… You don’t care? Sweet. I’m always ready for people to yell at me.”

“Hey, so I need to test the smoke alarm before we put it up, but I don’t want to frighten your little dog. I’ll try to muffle it, but you might want to hold her.” *clutching the alarm to his abdomen like Steve Rogers falling on a grenade* “I’m sorry little dog, I’m so sorry.”

(via you-me-and-the-banshee)

boffo-novelty-and-joke-shop:

jennyslateswife:

jennyslateswife:

i really do enjoy stories and character arcs that explore anger as a positive or at least curative force. that can allow room to say that, yes, too much anger and anger without direction can be hurtful and exhausting while still acknowledging that anger can be an important motivator.

there can be anger in justice. anger in healing. anger in grieving and bonding and forming a movement.

less stories with guilt surrounding anger and more stories asking “why shouldn’t i be angry?”

use anger as a point of clarity and focus not irrationality

Granny Weatherwax was often angry. She considered it one of her strong points. Genuine anger was one of the world’s greatest creative forces. But you had to learn how to control it. That didn’t mean you let it trickle away. It meant you dammed it, carefully, let it develop a working head, let it drown whole valleys of the mind and then, just when the whole structure was about to collapse, opened a tiny pipeline at the base and let the iron-hard stream of wrath power the turbines of revenge.

- Wyrd Sisters, Terry Pratchett

(via nerdvanauniverse)

wetwareproblem:

galahadwilder:

galahadwilder:

galahadwilder:

galahadwilder:

galahadwilder:

Imagine being a young superhero and newly-minted member of the Justice League. You’ve got a monitor shift with Superman, who you know as an invincible alien demigod who lives at the North Pole. You’re nervous about spending time with him—what do you even have in common with him? What could you even talk about?

And then shortly into monitor duty he casually mentions

his

WIFE???

“I was driving my son to preschool this morning—“

ARE THERE PRESCHOOLS AT THE NORTH POLE, SUPERMAN?

AND WHY WERE YOU DRIVING, FLYING MAN?

You start the shift thinking that Superman is this inhuman messiah-like figure who watches humanity from on high and has no human connections and then you spend the next hour steadily getting more flabbergasted as he tells you about how his six-year-old headbutted him in the nuts this morning before school and invulnerable toddler plus invulnerable nuts means actual pain and you’re just like “what the FUUUUUU—“

At one point Batman wanders in all brooding and Superman perks up and goes, “hey Bruce! How was the Parent-Teacher Conference?”

Batman has a name? His name is Bruce? He goes to PARENT-TEACHER CONFERENCES?

(Batman replies, in the most tired dad™️ voice you’ve ever heard, “Damian tried to stab his chemistry teacher again.”)

Apparently it is not a coincidence that JLA and PTA sound so similar.

Okay not ti hijack this excellent thread, but:

OP: …who you know as an invincible alien demigod who lives at the North Pole.
My brain: Wait a minute. Lives at the North Pole, happily married, inhuman and immortal, fast enough to get around the world in seconds, filled with goodwill for humanity and a strong sense of justice, enjoys home-baked treats and drinks his milk (he’s a country boy, after all)… Superman, are you SANTA?????

hesitating:

6thlovelanguage:

dark green is a nice color. underrated

ladies and gentlemen, Phtalo Green

(via westysnotwriting)

worddevourer:

Moments when you do not speak during a watchthrough of Lord of the Rings

1. Boromir’s death
2. The lighting of the beacons
3. Theoden’s speech at Pelennor Fields

Moments when you do speak during a watchthrough of Lord of the Rings

1. “Okay, but did you know that when he kicks that helmet, he actually breaks multiple toes?  That agonized scream is actual, physical pain, and it was by far the best take.”

(via charlesoberonn)

curliestofcrowns:

impling:

kittensforbrowncoats:

geobrarian:

muffinlevelchicanery:

Yes BUT. This specific desk is in a library so a parent that needs to use a library computer can do their work and have a little ease in managing their kiddo. In a library environment this is less productivity culture bullshit and more ‘oh this is a fantastic solution to a difficult situation library staff see 8 times a day’. Is it still productivity culture bullshit because this parent may not have affordable childcare or internet available to them? Yes. Am I glad it exists in a library environment to fill a demonstrated need? Hell yeah.

‘Revolutionary’ desk for working parents at Virginia library goes viral

The setup allows a parent to work while their child plays in an adjoining area.

KIRO 7 News Seattle

and keeps library staff from having to act as babysitters…

dear GOD we could use a couple of these. we keep crayons and coloring books on hand for the ones old enough for that, but the wee ones squirming and fussing in laps while the parents are fighting with job applications or convincing gmail’s current 2-step verification to let them in so they can print off a return label (both of which i have seen)? this would be SO NICE.

library groups have been loving this & are spreading the word & actively trying to purchase/create similar things in different systems

(via charlesoberonn)

bedrock-to-buildheight:

astraldemise:

astraldemise:

astraldemise:

astraldemise:

theres too many pokemon games where you play as a kid whos full of life and full of potential. there needs to be a pokemon game where you play as a college dropout who lives in a shitty apartment

your starter pokemon are trubbish, rattata and glameow. which symbolise the trash you keep forgetting to take out, the rats living in your walls and the stray cat you keep trying to befriend but it keeps hissing at you.

you guys dont get it its not supposed to be dark and edgy its supposed to be living in a mundane setting and slowly rediscovering the wonder in the world by going on a journey with a magical trash bag that is your friend, its about love and recovery and coping with the stress of your adult life with your friend who is made of sentient garbage

I’ve never been so attached to literal trash before

(via rainbow-squirrels-7)

existentialterror:

workfornow:

ms-demeanor:

ms-demeanor:

ashby-santoso:

averixus:

jumpingjacktrash:

greenjudy:

existentialterror:

Sometimes I’m looking for something online - often “how to” articles - and I want to filter for - like - a website that was clearly built in 2010 at the latest, which may or may not have been updated since then, but contains a vast wealth of information on one topic, painstakingly organized by an unknown legend in the field with decades’ worth of experience.

I don’t want a listicle with a nice stolen picture in a slideshow format written by a content aggregator that God forgot. I want hand-drawn diagrams by some genius professor who doesn’t understand SEO at all, but understands making stir-fries or raising stick insects better than anyone else on this earth. I don’t know what search settings to put into Google to get this.

thank you for articulating this cri de coeur for me

ngl these days i’m just happy when it’s not a video

search.marginalia.nu is the search engine you want!

The search engine calculates a score that aggressively favors text-heavy websites, and punishes those that have too many modern web design features.

This is in a sense the opposite of what most major search engines do, they favor modern websites over old-looking ones. Most links you find here will be nearly impossible to find on a regular search engine, as they aren’t sufficiently search engine optimized.

“It is a search engine, designed to help you find what you didn’t even know you were looking for. If you search for “Plato”, you might for example end up at the Canterbury Tales. Go looking for the Canterbury Tales, and you may stumble upon Neil Gaiman’s blog.

If you are looking for fact, this is almost certainly the wrong tool. If you are looking for serendipity, you’re on the right track. When was the last time you just stumbled onto something interesting, by the way?

I don’t expect this will be the next “big” search engine. This is and will remain a niche tool for a niche audience.“

i clicked around for a few minutes searching various things and I now have two fourteenth century pie crust recipes and an apple filling recipe i want to try, so thanks!

it has been twenty minutes and I am deeply in love with this search engine.

INCREDIBLE. I *do* want to know how to test Windows 95 for Y2K Compliance and I am glad that someone is still hosting step by step instructions for that.

tl;dr: search.marginalia.nu for the old or old looking and just plain serendipitous stuff that google or Duck duck go are gonna not find/bury on the 20th page. For perfectly good reasons, but …

My absolute favorite part of having made this post - other than causing people to be introduced to this site - are the people in the tags/comments talking about their interests and stuff they found about their hobbies.

Good luck out there surfing the cyberweb, you crazy cats. I love the shoelace website too - Ian’s Shoelace Site [link], unless there’s another. My personal favorite old-school site is Alysion’s string figure collection [link].

(via you-me-and-the-banshee)

nonbinary-octopus:

sonneillonv:

shanastoryteller:

wish there was a non rude way to be like “I understand your criticism, I don’t even necessarily disagree with it, but I am doing these things on purpose, because I like them and I want to, and therefore your opinion has no value, because you might think me painting a room entirely pink is tacky, but I did it on purpose”

“You’re right, but I’m really vibing with this right now, y'know?”

“hm. yeah so it turns out you are not the target demographic.”

(via kys-chai-and-books)

nerdvanauniverse:

thoodleoo:

normal-horoscopes:

thoodleoo:

thoodleoo:

thoodleoo:

thoodleoo:

yknow what i feel like going feral for some reason. send me the worst academic take about ancient greece or rome you’ve ever read in a published paper

dude that’s a take straight out of tumblr. impressive

HELLO????? THIS GOT *PUBLISHED*??????????

FEMINIST EURIPIDES WHO WILL HE GIRLBOSSIFY NEXT

wait this one owns. im going to read this.

The Odessey actually details directions for how to cross the Atlantic and travel up the Mississippi to modern day Chicago, which is actually an ancient Greek settlement. Also the Greeks wrote the magna Carta in 500BCE and released it to the world later.

for the love of god i am begging you to tell me where you read this so i can also read it and lose my mind about it

Not published, but I once had to read a paper that was basically ‘Agamemnon was the Real victim, not his daughter that he sacrificed, because it made him sad’ and I had to not fucking lose it. And give him constructive criticism that wasn’t just throw the whole bitch out.